Had a traumatic year, Herbie had a stroke a year ago, and died in September. We got to have 15 years together, married for 13, and had plans for his retirement last September to Tennessee. It was not to be. He always said he’d never get to retire, and had 5 months at home as he couldn’t drive having lost half his vision in his one eye.
Then last week I buried Anni, our mum Border Collie. She had a malignant tumour in between the back of her throat and nasal passages, which interfered with her vision and hearing as well, poor girl. I named her Anni because she was born on our 1st wedding anniversary. In September, I just wanted to run away, but I’ve made it through, well suppose the Winter isn’t over yet, on my own, carrying on with everything that needs to be done. The micro dairy is going well, there are currently 4 families on the waiting list, we’re all waiting for Hope to calve. She’s out in the main pasture by herself, and the birth is imminent, methinks. I’m a bit worried about her as she doesn’t seem well, she’s still hobbling around although the vet couldn’t find any specific problem with her back right hoof. She’s lost the position of ‘head cow’ to Ginger, and Ginger is just plain mean to her. She licks me whenever she can, but really smacks Hope and Annabelle around. Well, she’s always been bossy with Annabelle, but now she just pushes Hope around, keeps her away from the hay and water, so it’s better that I moved her to a pasture on her own. The other cows and bulls are between the veggie garden and the lower barn, so they pass her all the time and she’s not lonely, but none can push her, or jump her - she was being jumped by Spatch, Ginger and Annabelle over the weekend, I have a whole saga from Sunday which I may write down for you all in a bit. Ginger was on heat and Oliver was siring her, and thus not paying attention to what Spatch was doing, but at least Oliver didn’t launch his 2k lbs on top of her too. So far, there are 9 Spring lambs on the ground, lost 2 so far, a twin boy to Penny who was born on the coldest day possible and I think she couldn’t dry him in time after his sister arrived, and Catie lost one of her girl-twins, not sure what happened but she was dead in the side yard enclosure where I move the new mums and lambs for the first 3 days, maybe mum lay on her. I’ve figured out how to tag them on day 3 by myself, Herbie always used to help by holding them still while I tagged their ear with the State-required Scapie tag. Nanette and the Chads came out to help with the first one born, but it’s a 2-hour trip for them one way and I’m tagging every 3 days or so, so just not practical. For now, I’ve decided to stay on the farm. Everything I’ve read says don’t make big decisions for at least a year, and all our memories are here, I can still see Herbie in our house, with his horses, on a tractor, in the shed, and of course, sitting on both front and back patios, sans clothing 🙃. I’m thankful for all the help and concern I’ve received over the past 6 months, from people who don’t even ask what I need help with, they just get stuck in and help. There are a few I can call who’ll come out and help me, and those who just come and share a cup of tea and a chat, or who call checking up on me, and for them I’m grateful. Unfortunately, there have also been those that have turned their backs, maligned everything I am, but I can get through without them. Nanette named her son Herbie, for her dad, she was 6 months pregnant when Herbie died so this boy never got to meet his grandad. But both Nanette and I see a lot of Herbie in BH, Baby Herbie. Nanette has been an emotional strength for me, she arrived at the hospital as they were doing compressions on him, and we talk often, nearly daily, and she keeps me supplied with selfies with BH. Elizabeth has been out and helped me put up the plastic strip curtains between the lower barn and the milking parlour which has made the milk parlour bearable this Winter. I fire up the Gila monster, keep the hutch up to the shed closed and it gets nice and warm down there. I try go across to the East of the State every month to visit with MaStanley, and she calls Julie, and Elizabeth when I’m on my way over so I get to see them all. Need to go soon, but with lambing and Hope about to calve, I’m staying close to home to help where I can. I’ve pulled 2 lambs so far. It’s sort of amazing how the mums’ call me when they need help. Worried about Hope as I’m not strong enough to pull a calf by myself. Miss you Herbie. |
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March 2023
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